Stacy

Stacy

Love is all you need. Hey, I don't like John Lennon, but he said so. So why am I referencing the Beatles in a review of a Japanese zombie movie? Because once I finished watching Stacy, Lennon's words seemed as if they could be a fitting overture for what stands as one of the oddest zombie movies I've ever seen.

Stacy throws a lot of exposition at the audience, and in doing so paints a weird world even for a horror movie. Around the turn of the millennium, girls between 15 to 17 worldwide started dying off, and then reanimating as flesh hungry beasts dubbed Stacies. Within a short time, the planet's population is cut in half. To retaliate, the world's governments set up Romero Repeat Kill squads, basically SWAT forces, to kill the girls again. The movie then follows two main story threads: one girl, soon to turn Stacy, befriends a young puppeteer and asks him to kill her when the time is right; the other involves a squad of Repeat Killers who recruit two youths, one of which still has unresolved feelings for a Stacy.

Okay, so maybe that doesn't sound as odd as I set it up to be. But the devil, folks, is in the details. Imagine my awe and confusion when, 15 minutes into the movie, a commercial comes on with a woman in a bunny suit selling chainsaws named Bruce Campbell's Right Hand 2. There's a group of three soon-to-be Stacies who: a) charge a fee to kill Stacies for family members who don't have it in them to do it themselves, and b) worship Drew Barrymore! Right before becoming a Stacy, a teenager goes into a state of Near Death Happiness, as if becoming walking dead is the new going to the prom. A group of Repeat killers cries as they encounter a Stacy. Oh, and there's a dream about a creepy cat puppet.

What's really intriguing about Stacy is how the movie plays off Romero's zombie saga. One soldier references Peter's famous "no more room in Hell" speech, but can't remember if it's from Dawn or Day of the Dead. There's a mad doctor in blood spattered white scrubs. There's a horde of Stacies threatening to breach a wall and make dinner of the soldiers on the other side. And there's some really gory scenes that come a little too close to George's masterpieces, including one gut ripping scene that is right out of Savini's book. Clearly, Romero's universe has influenced movies not only across decades, but across continents. But the movie's not a total rip off of the godfather of zombie films, mainly because it follows the bizarre logic I laid out in my last few paragraphs.

Perhaps what's most disturbing about Stacy is the Stacies themselves. These aren't a group of adults who've suffered untimely deaths. Instead they're school girls, teens who've barely touched life. When a few girls make fun of another girl for having a letter from what they think is her boyfriend, it hammers the message home. These girls should be worried about homework and schoolgirl crushes, not shambling and feasting on humans. And the image of them in their school girl outfits, their heads bobbling and eyes lolling, S&M balls strapped to their mouths with leather harnesses... let's just say I was severely disturbed.

If there is a major turn off for this film, it's the ending. As my Japanese films expert sister Sarah has informed me, shows from that nation tend toward unresolved finishes, sometimes leaving the American viewer to say "Huh what?" Stacy gives a little more resolution than that, but still left me wondering just what the end of the movie was all about. Perhaps the message is what confused me: all the Stacies crave is love. That they seek it out in death is a paradox I'm still pondering a week after watching the movie.

As I said in my review of Versus, Japanese horror films are a different breed from their American counterparts. The wild color palettes, pacing, and unresolved endings may turn off those not used to the style. But don't let this stop you seeing Stacy. If you view it as a much different take on the Romero zombie saga, it could almost act as a sequel in that franchise, albeit a twisted one. And don't let the whole love thing chase you off. If you dig gore, zombies and Japanese horror, this is the film for you.

--Phil Fasso

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Posted by fasso at 12:02 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

28 Weeks Later (Widescreen Edition)

This disc is Region 4 and the special features (or lack thereof) may not be on DVD’s from different regions, you have been warned.

It wasn’t that long ago that the zombie movie was thrust back into the limelight, not since the days of Romero had the flesh eating villains of horror been given such notoriety. Zombie movies are my absolute favorite movies of all time (with Monster movies coming in a close 2nd) I guess I have the Resident Evil video games to thank for my love for out cannibalistic counterparts.

So along came 28 Days Later, an instant classic if ever there was one, violently bleak (aside from the off beat ending), it was a welcome breath of fresh air for our genre.

The inevitable sequel was soon announced…

28 Weeks Later kicks off kind of where 28 Days left off, with the last infected long since dead, the empty streets of London are gradually brought back to life as the United States attempts to re-populate the crippled country.

Don, a widowed husband whose wife is downed in that fucking amazing opening scene (…or so we thought!), is reunited with his son Andy, and his daughter Tammy at the rehabilitation facility outside of the abandoned city. Shit hits the fan and eventually the rage virus makes its way home (hee hee, that was in all honesty unintentional) and BAM, shit hits the fan yet again in one hell of a breakout scene. What follows is the Aliens of 28 Days Later, worthy of every tidbit of praise it has even and will ever receive, and considering how this biatch ends (I don’t know how they got there but I’ll be damned if it wasn’t cool) I eagerly await the next sequel because I can only see it getting bigger and better.

Unless you are mentally retarded you will have probably guess that I love this movie, and you would be very, very, very correct. 28 Weeks kicks ass in a major way, it’s bigger, better and badder then any horror or action flick of late.

The acting is above par, Robert Carlyle plays a double role as father (tell me you don’t feel for the guy in the opening) and infected, and let me just say, never has an infected looked as killer as Carlyle. There’s even a somewhat part for a token black guy (who DOESN’T get killed! It’s a sign of the coming apocalypse!) and he’s played by Harold Perrineu (so that’s what happened to Michael after he got off the island!).

And finally I find a movie with young actors I DON’T hate, they are Imogen Poots and Mackintosh Muggleton and I swear to god I didn’t make those names up

Oh the gore, the gore of it all. Hmm…how to describe…wet! It is bloody as all hell, each major effect is memorable. If this picture doesn’t give you a genre induced erection then you don’t deserve to be here;

A few plot holes aside, 28 Weeks Later is just as good as its predecessor, if not better, it’s just as dark and just as shocking whilst still having some subtle little statements to make if you’re paying attention. Jeremy Renner said it best; “…it’s everything the first one was, on crack.”

Okay so now we reach the special features.

Normally I don’t go into talking about the audio options on a DVD but I have to do it here because of the films soundtrack. If you have one, watch this on your 5.1 surround sound setup because if you don’t then you are depriving yourself of one of the greatest soundtracks of all time, the music in 28 Weeks is as big a part of it as the infected!

Kicking the disc off is an Audio Commentary with Juan Carlos Fresnadillo (director and one quarter screenwriter) and Enrique López-Lavigne (producer and also one quarter the screenwriter…I think. There’s a screenwriter credited as E.L. Lavigne, it’s only logical people!). Anyways, the commentary is a little bland as far as being a good time to listen to, it is informative but like many Frenchmen on commentaries they just don’t have any life!!! Thankfully they knew their shit and kept it going, even cracking a joke or two here and there.

Next on the chopping board (pun intended) is the Deleted Scenes portion of the DVD, if I was hungry and this section was cake I’d starve to death! There are only two scenes here, an extended cut of the cafeteria scene at the beginning and a dream scene near the end, both have commentary by Fresnadillo and Lavigne.

Code Red: Making 28 Weeks Later is the discs meatiest behind the scenes feature, I’ve noticed that recent behind the scenes features for other movies focus on star power, to this I say NO LONGER! Code Red does look at the actors at some point but for the most part it focuses on the concepts of 28 Weeks, the story, set design and the characters themselves.

The Infected is a look at just that, the infected, who have become characters unto themselves, we get to see the process they go through to be the vicious beasts they become as well as some of the effects that go into making an infected. Watching this I couldn’t help but think of the same feature on the Resident Evil: Apocalypse DVD, guess which one was better!

Let’s face it, 28 Weeks is a masterful blend of badass action and hardcore horror, which is exactly what Getting into the Action, is about. Showing us how some of the action scenes were done because there are a lot of them. We see how the filmmakers used action not for actions sake but also as a tool to reinforce the overall frenetic feel of the film.

28 Days Later: The Aftermath: Stage 1 “DEVELOPMENT” and 28 Days Later: The Aftermath: Stage 3 “DECIMATION” are two of the adaptation/spin off comics, the first of which was already on that damned ‘Limited Collector’s Edition’, the latter is the better of the two because it’s an interesting concept akin to the prison life in John Carpenter’s Escape from New York, where two survivors are essentially playing a game of one up with each other in an infected London (too bad it was so short). I don’t have a clue where ‘Stage 2’ is however, that one has me puzzled.

Rounding off the DVD is the films bad-motherfucking-ass Theatrical Trailer.

-Danny

MOVIE: 4 out of 5

DVD: 3 out of 5

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Posted by dannyp at 04:35 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Sometimes They Come Back

SOMETIMES THEY COME BACK

This DVD/Box Set is Region 4 and the special features (or lack thereof) may not be on DVDs/Box Sets from different regions, you have been warned.

I’m writing this review at 1:26am, chances are I’ll be up long after I finish writing, chances are it’ll be the same tomorrow night, the night after that, and then the night after that, you see the reason why I stay up into the wee hours of the morning is simply because I can. Sometimes it seems that the filmmakers cranking out (Stephen King) adaptation after adaptation have the exact same mindset.

There have been so many that it’s hard to pick up a new copy of an old King novel and not see the words; “Now a major motion picture” printed across its cover. It’s at this point that I’d normally rave and rant about how director Tom McLoughlin botched up an otherwise well made and genuinely creepy story, but Sometimes They Come Back is by no means a bad movie, it’s just not a very good one.

When he was just a kid, Jim and his big brother were walking home one day when they decide to take a detour through a short rail road tunnel, movie lore clearly states that nobody can do such an act without sever repercussions so it’s not surprising that their little trip is cut short in the form of a gang of grease heads in a car, they attempt to mug the brothers, accidentally killing the older one.

A train decides to stop by and say a quick howdy-doody to them all, the grease audition rejects are killed when they realize that their keys are missing. Jim manages to survive.

Years later, Jim is now an English teacher with an anger problem who takes up a job teaching in a new town, his students are your typical jock fellows who want nothing more then to just sit around and gawf, things start getting kooky when Jims some of Jims students start getting killed off and replaced with very familiar looking fellows who drive a very familiar car…can you see where this is going?

I can’t believe how much potential this movie wasted, besides being unbelievably dated to the point of incoherency by today’s standards, there is so much that could have been done better, the whole idea that Jim is imagining the thing he sees could have been better explored.

Then there’s the ending…can anyone say stupid? The movie substitutes the novels darker, more ambiguous ending for a happy upbeat brotherly love ending, it’s cheesy, it’s sappy and it’s crappy.

As for the disc itself….well there’s not that much to tell, the picture quality is not spectacular, it looks like a shitty VHS transfer, hell I don’t doubt it, there’s only a 2.0 Stereo track and no special features of any shape, way or form, not so much as a trailer nor a filmography.

Waste of time, waste of space, but thank god I didn’t pay for it!

MOVIE: 2 out of 5

DVD: 0 out of 5

Sometimes They Buy This DVD On Amazon.com

Posted by dannyp at 04:31 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Saw IV (Unrated Widescreen Edition)

Ah Beth, this is what happens when I am encouraged to shit on a movie, but first…I want to play a game!

This review shall be your trap and you are its victim, to save yourself you must watch (read) as I tear the living shit out of a movie you liked.

Live or Die Beth….it does matter.

The fourth installment in what is fast becoming this generations Friday the 13th, SAW IV continues the annual tradition of gory traps, mind bending twists and sinful victims.

But wait now, the victims I speak of aren’t the ones on screen, oh no my dear readers, the sinful victims are the poor saps who went into the movie with high hopes, hopes which were raised higher then Cheech or Chong could ever get by teasers (which lived up to their names), Bousmans’ ‘infamous’ ‘double meanings’, and a slew of mouthwatering promises, their punishment…to have their hopes come crashing down hard for being stupid enough to believe the hype.

The movie opens with an autopsy of Jigsaws wrinkly corpse (ladies you can see his nads!), this is one of the few good scenes in the movie only because the effects (with a few exceptions) were fucking spectacular. Inside Jiggys’ stomach the coroner finds a wax coated cassette tape…….what you want me to tell you why it’s there? Come on people if it’s this late in the game (puns you very much) and you still aren’t clued in then maybe it’s time to call it quits.

Ahem, so then we cut to Detective Riggs and Hoffman (Murtoge couldn’t make it to this one!), you may remember these two happy characters from the 3 seconds they were in the last movie, Riggs gets the bigger roll because his resume says he played a 10 minute character in SAW II, yippee.

Essentially Riggs must go trough a series of tests which an unknown Jigsaw wannabe has been putting up all around town for him, we have a suspect of course due to a scene earlier on which came out of nowhere. If Riggs can pass his tests he will be able to save both Detective Hoffman *cough* Jigsaw Wannabe *cough*, and former LAPDs’ finest, Detective Eric Mathews, yes kiddos he is still alive, I guess Amanda didn’t have enough balls to kill the resilient son of a bitch.

Whilst all this is going on, two FBI agents whose names I cannot remember (for Christ sakes people it was hard enough keeping up with this incoherent plot without committing to memory the names of nothing characters who will probably be the main characters of the inevitable SAW V)…they have the delightful job of interrogating John ‘Jigsaw’ Kramer’s ex-girlfriend…let me tell you guys I hope I’m banging gals that good looking when I am Jiggys’ age.

With the introduction of Jiggys’ ex into the picture we get even further insight into the making of Jiggyland™, where the owner is a carpenter by day and an insanely elaborate trap making serial killer by night.

Dammit jeeves I’m ready for my twist……..so where is it?

As you should be able to tell by now I am having a hell of a fun time tearing the shit out of this movie with this review, and why shouldn’t I? After my initial reaction to seeing it (that windshield cost me $175 to repair, I kid you not) this is frigging therapy for me.

I was one of those gullible suckers who ate up every tidbit of news from the very moment they came out, but no longer am I a fan of the SAW movies, I have been reduced to having to say that I am a fan of the first three SAW movies….can you spot the difference?

*Sigh* so what made it such a let down? We may as well dive right into the deep end and get to the plot problem, oh boy were there some big ones.

Riggs must go through a series of tests to save Mathews because he has a bit of a habit of wanting to save people, I don’t know about you but it seems like Jigsaws’ radar for sinners has been knocked a little askew for this one.

Each trap, just like Jeff’s’, has the victims lives depend on decisions made by Riggs who is all the while being subliminally coaxed into living the Jiggology™ way of life, will somebody please tell me who the fuck set all this shit up? Amanda was busy kidnapping Lynn and Hoffman probably nabbed Jeff’s’ sorry ass. I am well aware that Jigsaw is always thinking of Plan As’, Bs’, Cs’ and probably Ds’ but COME ON! Oh I’ve got an original idea, maybe there’s a third apprentice! Shit I didn’t see that one coming [INSERT SARCASM HERE].

Then there’s the choice of Jigsaws’ heir, okay we always knew there was going to be a new apprentice (YOU’RE FIRED…sorry, couldn’t help it) but did it seriously have to be the guy that people had been suspecting since day one? And the fact that they ripped of their own franchise had me confused to high hell. I do remember Darren saying in an interview that they were going to try and bring back elements from the first three, I didn’t expect him to carbon copy them, the ending is the same as SAW, the more-is-more attitude is SAW II and the main plot is SAW III, was there anything left over to be called SAW IV?

Yes actually there was! The insight into Jigsaws long lost past was actually quite interesting, the reason for this can be boiled down to Tobin Bells’ acting, which is still exceptional.

While we are on the subject of acting, Lyriq Bent is almost as charismatic as a cardboard cut out standee, Costa Mandylor was better in Dr. Chopper for Christ sake (wow now that was harsh), and as for the two FBI agents…meh. You know you’re in trouble when you can’t even out act a dead body!

At the very least they could have had a good twist ending but even that was missing, instead we get a neutered down rehash of past endings, the only good thing about it was Mathews death, despite being a rip off at least that was shocking to watch (Somebody’s been watching Final Destination 3).

Holy shit its Jeff! Oh wait, no that’s just the second twist ending, the fact that SAW IV is actually taking place at the same time as SAW III would have been cool if the whole misleading timeline hadn’t already been done (and much better for that matter) in SAW II.

Where’s my sandwich board when I need it, I’m going to start a protest. Darren you promised us stuff and unlike the troops in Iraq, you backed out…why?

You promised us SAW IV…when? This isn’t SAW IV, this is SAW 3 ½!

You promised us the biggest twist ending in the entire SAW series…where?

Are you honestly expecting people to be shocked at the revelation that the guy who played a man whose wife was a chiropractor who committed suicide because she couldn’t cure a patients’ back ache? (That was in Dr. Chopper by the way)

The best that you could hope for is some good gore but even that was made null and void, yes there is the autopsy (which was actually pretty kick ass) but it’s the traps we’re looking at and yes they are violent but honestly there isn’t much else to them, the hair trap was cringe inducing but other then that they were so damn weak it’s not funny, we don’t see half the bloodletting because we get more shaky cam action and I’m not even going to go there (check out my Halloween and Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem reviews if you want my opinion on that fucking filmmaking technique).

I should wrap this up because if I keep going it’ll be SAW V time when you finish reading this, but damn it there’s so much more I could say that I feel like I’m short changing you all by finishing here.

Plot holes, bad plot, bad twist, bad characters, bad gore, bad…everything killed this movie, I am well aware that there are people who liked it (Beth I’m looking at you) but why is it that the majority of them didn’t like either SAW or SAW III but did like SAW II? The only other one which opted to use violence over plot! Is SAW IV the lazy man/ woman’s SAW? Hopefully I’ll like it better when it comes out on DVD, but I doubt it.

I hoped it was over, but I was wrong because now they’re making SAW V.

Live or Die? Give me the fucking gun. BAM I made my choice.

- Danny

MOVIE: 2 out of 5

Live Or Buy. The Choice Is Yours. Buy This DVD On Amazon.com (You Only Have 60 Seconds)

Posted by dannyp at 04:28 PM | Permalink | Comments (5)